Ep 88: A Conversation About Race

Dr. Beverly Daniel Tatum, psychologist, educator, and author of
"Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?"
joins us for a candid and in-depth conversation about race,
identity, and how to start difficult conversations of your own in
the home. In support of increased education and awareness of the
experiences of POC, we are pleased to share the full 52 minute
conversation in this special episode featuring Dr. Tatum.


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Full show notes


Right now, America is once again in the midst of having one of
the most important—and most complicated—conversations: the
conversation about race. With the death of George Floyd at the
hands of the Minneapolis police, reactions to racial disparity in
America have exploded in the form of peaceful protests, community
organization, and social media activism, as well as dramatic
incidents of looting and rioting. No matter where we turn, we’re
face-to-face with a set of daunting, hard-to-answer questions
that have haunted America through all its history.


Living in such a tumultuous time can be a lot for anyone. It’s
especially a lot for teenagers and young people in general. For
parents, the conversation surrounding race holds a special
significance in the home. Black, Latinx, Asian, Native American,
and other non-White homes want to talk about race and ethnic
identity in teenagers. They want to make sure their children are
prepared to face race-related challenges that could arise over
the course of their adolescence, and certainly, all parents want
their children to be unbiased and empathetic toward others,
regardless of skin color.


However, the language surrounding race and ethnic identity in
teenagers is often packed with loaded terminology and
uncomfortable historical facts, making it intimidating for many
parents to openly address race with their children. But to ensure
the next generation of adults is prepared to continue fighting
for racial equality, it’s absolutely essential for all parents to
know how and why to talk about race openly and honestly, no
matter how difficult it seems.


To explore how race and ethnic identity in teenagers and what
parents can do to foster open dialogues about race in the home, I
spoke with the esteemed Dr. Beverly Daniel Tatum. Dr. Tatum is
the former president of the historically Black college Spelman
University, a recipient of the American Psychological
Association’s top honor, and author of the renowned book Why Are
All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?: And Other
Conversations About Race.


As one of our country’s foremost scholars on race and a teacher
of race-related subjects for over thirty years, it’s no surprise
Dr. Tatum offers some incredible takeaways for listeners in this
week’s episode. When it comes to talking about race and ethnic
identity in teenagers, Dr. Tatum doesn’t shy away from the fact
that all people need to be engaged, not just people of color.


How To Talk To Teens About Race


Racism is a prejudice that hurts everyone in society. But in that
same vein, anyone can help eliminate racism by being actively
anti-racist, such as consciously dismantling racist systems or
educating oneself on what social justice is. To illustrate her
point, she compares racism to smog; if not everybody is actively
involved in cutting emissions, our air will never be clean. It’s
the same, she claims, for racism. Unless everyone is involved in
fighting for racial equality, racism will always be a problem.


And that fight starts with addressing the reality of racism in
America. After all, you can’t fix a problem unless you’ve
identified it first! This idea directly opposes the “colorblind”
approach to race, where people pretend not to “see” skin color.
When one tries to deny the presence of any one person’s color,
that is to deny what shapes that person’s entire life.


Dr. Tatum and I discussed an anecdote about race and ethnic
identity in teenagers regarding a white father being proud of his
young daughter for “not seeing color.” The man’s daughter was
pointing out her new friend on the playground and she was using
descriptors to point out which girl she was talking about. The
daughter talked about everything about her friend except for the
fact that she was the only Black girl present.


In this week’s interview about race and ethnic identity in
teenagers, Dr. Tatum not only explains why this mindset is
harmful, but she gives great advice on what parents can do to
embrace, accept, celebrate, and navigate the implications of
REC—racial-ethnic-cultural—identities in the home—even White
families. There’s nothing wrong with being White in the same way
that pointing out that someone is Black is not wrong or rude.


When talking about race and ethnic identity in teenagers, it’s
important to affirm heritage as something that makes people
unique. Their background is something that helps shape them as a
person as they grow into young adulthood. When they feel
empowered, secure, and not ashamed about their own heritage, they
can be more willing to have discussions about other people’s
backgrounds and how they interact with people who are different
from them. This goes for everyone.


In fact, Dr. Tatum addresses how White families can act as firm
and steadfast allies, and she even offers an alternate term for
White privilege to help clarify its definition: White immunity.
With the phrase, “White privilege,” there’s been a fair amount of
controversy surrounding its usage. Many White people do not
necessarily feel like they have led privileged lives. “White
immunity” communicates the fact that White people are the most
protected class in a mostly White society. Furthermore, that
people of color experience in some negative experiences
disproportionate amounts, such as police brutality and racial
profiling. White people rarely experience these issues concerning
race and ethnic identity in teenagers in a mostly White society.


In the course of our conversation about race and ethnic identity
in teenagers, Dr. Tatum also discusses the changes in policy,
psychology, population, and polarization (the “Four Ps”) that
have impacted the discussion surrounding race—valuable
information to parents keen to learn more about the current state
of racism in America. This may seem like a lot of information to
take in about a very delicate subject, but it is a process. Being
an active participant in the process of dismantling racism is
exactly what needs to be done. It’s not an overnight event,
rather, a completely different way of living.


More Resources About Teenagers and Identity


There’s no way that the topic of race and ethnic identity in
teenagers can be covered in one podcast episode. However, the
discussion Dr. Tatum and I had is absolutely worthwhile for you
and your teen to listen to and engage with.


On top of her great insight on race and ethnic identity in
teenagers, Dr. Tatum and I discuss:


Addressing race and diversity in education

How race and brain development go hand-in-hand for teens

Why the history of racism is so important

Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs)

The concept of “White guilt” and what you can do to overcome
it



With such a rich and critical topic at hand, and considering the
current political climate, I know all listeners will find...