Ep 323: From Passenger to Explorer Mode

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that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more
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Jenny Anderson and Rebecca Winthrop, authors of The Disengaged
Teen, join us to discuss their insights on teenage disengagement
and share strategies to foster better learning, emotional
well-being, and overall development in teenagers.





When it comes to our teens' education, many of us attempt to walk
a tightrope, balancing between overly optimistic perceptions and
stark realities. As parents, we often perceive our teens as more
engaged in learning than they truly are. What we might not
realize is that many teenagers experience varying levels of
disengagement during their educational journey, which can affect
their overall growth and happiness. Understanding these dynamics
within our children can drastically change our approach and
thereby foster better communication and support.


In this episode, we explore the science of teenage disengagement
with Jenny Anderson and Rebecca Winthrop, the authors of The
Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live
Better. Jenny, an award-winning journalist, and Rebecca, a senior
fellow at Brookings and professor at Georgetown University, come
together to bring attention to the various ways teens engage with
school and learning. Through research and extensive interviews,
they’ve identified different modes of learning engagement that
teens experience: Resistor, Passenger, Achiever, and Explorer
modes. 


Their framework serves as a tool to help us recognize and support
our teens based on their unique engagement level. The authors
explain how crucial it is to tailor our approach to these modes,
especially as teenage learning engagement can directly impact
their emotional well-being and future success. Jenny and Rebecca
provide insightful observations, such as why boys might be more
prone to being in Passenger mode and how fostering agency is key
to shifting them into Explorer mode.


Understanding the Four Modes


Jenny and Rebecca delve deep into the characteristics of each
mode. They urge parents to consider intentional questions beyond
the simple "How was your day?"–questions that encourage teens to
express more than routine responses. They also stress the
importance of recognizing early signs of disengagement,
especially when children are content with coasting and not
pushing themselves to explore or challenge what they know.


Achiever mode might initially sound ideal, with teens appearing
diligent and high-performing, but the conversation reveals a
hidden downside. Unhappiness in Achiever mode—an inability to
cope with failure and a fixation on perfectionism—can lead to
mental health challenges. 


Encouraging Curiosity and Agency


The authors enlighten us about the importance of curiosity and
the role of perceived agency in encouraging teens to shift from
Passenger or Achiever modes into the coveted Explorer mode.
Rather than telling teenagers what to pursue, parents are
encouraged to notice their children’s interests and support them,
regardless of whether it aligns with traditional goals, such as
college admissions.


Jenny and Rebecca also emphasize the importance of giving teens
free time to rest their minds and explore creative unconventional
thought. They discuss how moments of unstructured time foster
creativity and lead to "Transcendent Thinking," a deeper level of
cognitive engagement that comes from meaningful, self-driven
inquiry.


Breaking the Nagging-Procrastination Cycle


Many parents find themselves trapped in a cycle of nagging and
procrastination, striving to get their children to complete their
tasks. Jenny and Rebecca suggest practical methods to help break
this cycle by prompting kids to make their own plans and holding
them accountable to those plans—ultimately encouraging them to
take responsibility for their learning.


In the Episode...


Our conversation with Jenny and Rebecca reveals critical insights
into teenage learning engagement. Beyond the topics discussed, we
also delve into:


The impact of social expectations on teenage learning

How parental expectations can inadvertently contribute to
perfectionism

The benefits of redefining success for our kids

Specific strategies for helping teens open up about their
educational experiences



Feeling equipped to tackle teenage disengagement? Hear the full
episode to help your teen learn, feel, and live better. Don't
forget to subscribe to Talking to Teens for more illuminating
conversations.


Sponsored by Equip: Eating disorder treatment
that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more
information, and a free consultation.