Ep 102: Is Your Teen’s Tech Use Healthy, Junky, or Toxic?

Dr. Shimi Kang, author of The Tech Solution and Dolphin
Parenting, spreads the word on the three types of tech use
(toxic, junk, & healthy) and the consequences of each. Plus
how to manage any new apps that teens might get into.


Sponsored by Equip: Eating disorder treatment
that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more
information, and a free consultation.


Full show notes


Technology is not going away, but it can feel like our teens have
been looking at a screen for half their lives. With so many new
distracting gadgets and apps, it’s often overwhelming to monitor
our teen’s usage--not to mention try to keep an eye on our own!


It’s important to make sure teens gain an understanding of how
tech and apps work. They will likely have to use various
softwares and apps when they join the workforce, and they need to
know how to adapt to new tech. But striking a balance between the
good tech and the bad tech is tricky.


This week, Dr. Shimi Kang, author of The Tech Solution: Creating
Healthy Habits for Kids Growing Up in a Digital World, clues me
in on how different types of tech are hurting and helping teen’s
developing brains--and what to do if you’ve already tried and
failed to pry a phone from your screen-addicted teen.


As addiction psychiatrist, Dr. Kang noticed an increasing number
of teens and young adults in her practice with tech-addiction.
Some of her patients can feel their anxiety rise from simply
parting with their phone during a session. Parents she spoke with
reported such extremes as violence when taking away phones or
shutting off gaming consoles or wifi.


Dr. Kang recognizes that there will always be a new addicting app
around the corner. Through her research for the book, she also
uncovered the truth that technology incorporates “persuasive
design.” Persuasive design means the websites, app, and gadgets
we use are designed to be addictive—the more people use a website
or an app, the longer the makers have to expose users to
advertisements and up-sells.


This is not to say technology is bad—we have technology to thank
for plenty of advancements and improvements. Dr. Kang argues it
is the way in which we engage with tech that determines whether
we can consider it good or bad.


The three types of tech use Dr. Kang has come up with are: toxic
tech, junk tech, and healthy tech. In today’s episode we cover
what each one looks like and how to help your teen self-regulate
their tech use.


Toxic tech


From brain imaging researchers have been able to identify that
certain technology use causes spikes in the stress hormone
cortisol. Too much of the stress hormone cortisol has been linked
to anxiety, depression, irritability, and even physical problems
like high blood pressure and stomach ulcers.


What might toxic tech look like with a teen? While it’s unlikely
your teen will develop stomach ulcers from toxic tech use alone,
as the name implies, toxic tech should be avoided. Shimi suggests
social media as the big toxic tech to avoid. Teens compare
themselves to the perfect looking celebrities they see on social
media which can cause feelings of inferiority and therefore
trigger stress. Receiving negative comments or being bullied,
seeing violent or graphic content, even reading through a fiery
comment feud, all have the potential to spike cortisol.


It is probably impossible to avoid all the toxic tech there is
out there, but it should be limited as much as possible.


Junk Tech


Junk tech is the type of tech that is most addicting. Junk tech
makes use of the brain’s dopamine reward system, which is how
teens and even adults can get addicted to silly games like Candy
Crush and Angry Birds. The “persuasive design” of apps and sites
like Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, video streaming (e.g. Netflix)
also have teens glued to their screen as they double-tap and
“like” posts only to glance up and find hours have passed since
they first logged on!


Junk tech does not increase cortisol, but the mindless nature of
endless scrolling on Instagram or autoplay on Netflix not only
becomes a huge time suck, but is a passive activity for the
brain.


At a time when brains are developing their dopamine pathways,
it’s important to help our teens set limits on how much junk tech
they consume. Instead of just tuning in to TikTok, an alternative
could be creating one which turns junk tech into healthy tech.


Healthy Tech


To determine if something is healthy tech, Dr. Kang says it
should fall into one of the three Cs: care (self-care),
connection, or creativity. Making a TikTok instead of just
watching a hundred of them, would involve creativity—if your teen
makes a TikTok with someone else, you can even count it as
“connection” too!


FaceTiming with a friend (connection), using a meditation app
(care), tracking your steps/sleep on a Fitbit (care), building a
website (creativity), or using video editing software
(creativity) are all healthy tech use according to Shimi.


Instead of having to make up new rules for each app or site, Dr.
Kang says to make rules around the three types of tech instead.
Determine as a family how much of each would be appropriate.
Adults and kids will probably have different rules as more adult
responsibilities such as bill paying move online. If your child
is doing remote schooling, you can add allowances for screen time
as related to classwork.


Again, as Dr. Kang asserts, technology is here to stay—we need to
help teens learn to navigate tech on their own, including how to
self-regulate. Using the three types of tech as a framework, and
explaining the science of the hormones behind each can help teens
understand that rules around tech are not to control them, but to
help eliminate stressful, toxic tech; limit junk tech; and expand
healthy tech.


In addition to our discussion on the three types of tech
use, Shimi and I cover:


How to bring up tech limits if you are getting a late start

Why it’s important to be a “dolphin parent”

What you can do if your teens call you out on your tech use

A visualization script to prepare teens to overcome obstacles
and achieve their goals

What you know about the increasing incidents of burnout among
teens



Dr. Shimi has so much experience as a practicing addiction
psychiatrist and author of two parenting books—I’m so excited to
share her expertise on technology use with you, our listeners!


Sponsored by Equip: Eating disorder treatment
that works—delivered at home. Visit equip.health/talking for more
information, and a free consultation.