201 Lots of fish in the sea, how do I find mine?

We’ve made a ton of episodes about how to work on relationships
once you’re in them. But we also often get asked… how do I
actually find good matches while dating??


It’s not always as easy as making an online dating profile and
seeing how it goes. We often focus so much on what we want in a
partner that we forget to ask ourselves what we’re actually
available to offer. If you’re struggling with dating, we’re gonna
help you get clear on your availability and bottom-line
requirements, which just might totally transform the experience
from an exhausting exercise to an exciting opportunity for
genuine connection.


In this episode, we talk about:


— The critical difference between knowing what you want in a
partner versus knowing what you're available to offer


— Why fawning (trying to be what you think others want) leads to
unsatisfying connections and wasted time


— How to identify and honor your "bottom-line requirements" in
relationships


— Why the dating pool in non-monogamy can feel smaller, leading
to scarcity mindset and compromising on what truly matters


— The importance of creating dating contexts that support your
authentic self (like choosing coffee shops over romantic
restaurants for first dates)


— Why having 2-3 specific questions you ask on every first date
can help you gather crucial information


— How to balance putting your best foot forward without falling
into people-pleasing patterns


— The value of taking breaks from dating when needed and
returning with renewed clarity


— Why articulating what you ARE available for is more powerful
than listing what you're NOT available for


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Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠Blue Dot Sessions