177 Shadow Dance: Navigating Projections in Relationships

The word projection gets thrown around a lot these days, often in
an accusatory way (think, “so-and-so is projecting!”). But
projection is actually a normal, unconscious psychological
process that shows up in all relationships!


That doesn’t mean we should let our projections go unchecked.
They can interfere with our ability to truly see our partners as
whole, autonomous beings.


The good news is that when we become aware of our projections, we
have a powerful opportunity to uncover and reclaim the parts of
ourselves we’ve denied and disowned. And these aren’t always
deep, dark shadowy parts—they can also be positive traits like
creativity or intelligence.


In this episode, we explore what projection is, how it shows up
in relationships, and why reclaiming these “shadow” parts is
essential for personal growth. Tune in to learn how working
through projections can deepen your connections and help you see
yourself—and your partners—in a whole new light.


We’re breaking down:


— What psychological projection is and how it operates in our
subconscious minds


— The role of projection in falling in love, limerence, and new
relationship energy


— How projection can interfere with seeing our partners as
sacred, autonomous beings


— The stages of becoming aware of and working through projections


— Why reclaiming projected qualities is essential for personal
growth


— How projection relates to childhood wounds and unresolved
issues from the past


— The dangers of over-identifying with negative projections or
shadow qualities


— Practical strategies for recognizing and working with
projections in relationships


— The value of patience and compassion when addressing
projections with a partner


Resources mentioned in this episode:


— Carl Jung's Collected Works (This is the Wikipedia page, to
give you an idea of what the CW contains. If you’re looking for a
good place to begin reading Jung’s work, Joli suggests Memories,
Dreams, Reflections)


— PWF Episode 164: I HATE THIS: Get Unstuck with Existential Kink
(A shadow work method)


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Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠Blue Dot Sessions