20: I Relapsed on Porn. What Do I Do Now?

FREE LESSON: Write Your Walk Through Fire Statement


When I was addicted to porn, I often struggled to know how to
respond to a relapse. The amount of shame, fear, and anger I felt
when I slipped was overwhelming. 


I thought that if I relapsed on porn, it meant all of my progress
was now down the toilet. I thought, “What reason do I have to
stop watching porn now? Afterall, my time clean is zero. So, why
not just give in for a while?” 


Working with other addicts I sponsor and coach has shown me that
I was not the only one who felt this way after I relapsed. People
often tell me after a slip that they feel like giving up. 


After a full year of sobriety, one addict recently told me after
he relapsed, “I’m just having trouble finding my meaning again. I
don’t know why I should stay sober. I know I want to, but I just
don’t feel the drive to stay clean like I did before.” 


I could not tell him how much I understood those feelings. I had
been there many times after relapses. The will to go on wanes, as
the momentum you previously experienced dies down. Getting it
going again is painful. But it can be done. 


When you relapse on porn, it is easy to feel like giving up and
giving in. I understand that feeling, as it happened to me so
many times as an addict. 


One of the things I came to find out after years of sobriety is
that this mentality of giving up was not exclusive to my porn
recovery alone. I practiced this type of hopeless thinking in
multiple areas of my life. It was not until I began changing my
mindset - from an addiction mindset to a recovery mindset - that
I started to experience more success staying clean. 


We’ll address these points in this episode. If you’ve relapsed on
porn, my prayer is that these teachings will help get you back on
track. 



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