Emotional Healing | Don’t Tell Me How to Heal PERIOD!

 


 


 


I’ve been seeing this meme floating around  on social media
saying, “stop telling people how to heal from stuff you’ve never
been through”….


 


Well, here’s a suggestion for ya…
Stop telling people how to heal their [emotional] pain
PERIOD!

 


ヅ








Recently, while standing in the middle of the aisle
at Walgreens looking for Dove’s pear and aloe vera
soap, I heard the words,  


 


“Girl, stop crying and get out of bed. Your
life could be a lot worse.


He’ll be back when he realizes what he
lost….” 


 


I was a little taken aback by the conversation for
two reasons…


 


One…. because here’s this lady is on the phone in a
public place [loudly] having a conversation that most
certainly should have been kept private.


And two because…….


 


Oh my gosh!  Why is she telling her that when
she’s obviously hurting — like in serious emotional
pain?


But, being the mind your business girl that I
am, I shook it off, grabbed my soap and went on my
merry little way. 






 


In all honesty, the lady probably meant no harm and she
clearly thought she was helping her friend; but the
reality is when someone is going through a moment of
despair the last thing she wants to hear is, “it could be
worse.”   


 The fact that it could be worse does not lessen the
pain she’s feeling in that moment, does it?


 Of course not! 


She may stop crying and she may even get out of bed, but
it’s not because she realizes that it could be
worse. 


It’s because she just realized that her friend doesn’t
care about her pain – or at least that what’s she’s
thinking because her friend (unknowingly) implied that
her feelings are not valid.   


So, she’s getting out of bed because now she’s got to
prove to her friend that she’s bigger than this 
pain she’s experiencing.
Ladies!!! We gotta stop doing this to each
other. 

 


I talk to women everyday who are hurting, broken,
struggling to recover from various traumas and tragedies
– abuse, rape, rejection, death, break ups – pain that
has left them feeling hopeless, worthless and un-loved.
As a matter of fact, I used to be one of them. 


…but they can’t get the healing they need because family,
friends, society, religion have made them feel like they
can’t feel what they’re feeling.


Join Natty and I at the virtual table as we shed some
light on how harmful our words can be when we’re not
sensitive to the trauma of others.






 


And when you’re finished, we’d love to hear your thoughts on how
you support your friends and family when life happens
unexpectedly.  So, hop on over to  Shades of
Strong and  share your story with us via voice
message. 


OR


Head on over
to FACEBOOK or TWITTER, or INSTAGRAM @shadesofstrong
and join the conversation by leaving us a comment or tweet. 
 If you’re tweeting with us, be sure to use the hashtag
#shadesofstrong. Happy listening peeps!


 
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