Understanding and Investing in Your Empathy Talent -- Season 4

To learn more about Gallup's additional strengths resources, visit
the Gallup Strengths Center: http://on.gallup.com/1l04XVZ.

Gallup's Theme Thursday is a live Webcast that targets strengths
coaches and enthusiasts to provide a deeper context behind the
language of strengths by talking in-depth about each of the 34
Clifton StrengthsFinder themes.

On this Theme Thursday Season Four webcast, Jim Collison, Gallup's
Director of Talent Sourcing, and Maika Leibbrandt, Senior Workplace
Consultant, talk about Empathy.

Empathy is experiencing the emotion of others, feeling what others
feel, and connecting by sensing. People with high Empathy are
emotionally intuitive. Empathy is knowing through being present and
paying attention to other people.

When Empathy is at its best, it serves as a barometer. You’re
understanding the absorption of your message, and those of others.
The extension of Empathy is not only being able to sense but
anticipating the reaction and needs of others then tailoring your
work to meet their needs. If relevance is the bulls-eye, Empathy
can help you increase your accuracy on the moving target. Listen
for what is meaningful, when it’s meaningful, how it is best
heard.

Do more by practicing putting words to the unstated and
understated. Speak up for clients or customers who you sense are
not being heard. Act as a delegate or a champion for your peers.
Where is their positive energy? Empathy isn’t just about knowing
when someone is upset, it’s also about sharing in celebration.
Where is there hesitation or anxiety? Practice putting what you’re
sensing into words to help your leader or peers discover what is
actually happening. Take action quickly and firmly when you sense
someone is behaving in a way that is unhealthy for them or others.
Understanding someone’s emotional state doesn’t mean you have to
excuse negative behavior. When your empathy turns to sympathy, you
may be seen as overly forgiving.

Ask for freedom to release your own emotion. You sense what
everyone else is feeling, and at times it may feel like you are
carrying a lot of weight so you will need a safe environment,
trusted relationship, or a practice that helps you let it all out
without judgement. Ask for access to people in multiple channels
and pay attention to when your intuition is spot on. Is it best
when you’re one on one? Then ask for more one on one time. Is it
over the phone? Are you excellent at honing your text empathy? Most
people find their Empathy works best in person, so if that’s true
for you, ask for that face time. Additionally, never eat alone.
Eating with others is an opportunity to sneak in connection time
that might be more available for others than looking for a
scheduled meeting time.

Worry less about having a thick skin, or being stoic and unaffected
in the face of emotional mess. You’re going to feel what others are
feeling, so don’t pretend that doesn’t affect you. Know what kind
of self-care helps you release what you’ve absorbed.

Expect people with high Empathy to be in-tune and intuitive. They
may surprise you at how well they can pin you. Trust this because
it’s not a show to impress you, it’s an awareness. It’s an
awareness and presence with those they’re working around, playing
around, or living around. You can also expect a willingness to be
led. In combination to Empathy, there’s an adaptability to be led
by the present moment. The best plans can change based upon how
your audience is reacting.

Recognize when someone’s instinct has steered you away from the
plan and lead you into perfection. Celebrate their past, present,
and future Empathy. When have they uncovered something important in
the past? How do they enhance the collaboration of the team right
now? What are we doing in the future because of their perception or
intuition?

Stretch by helping them know when and how to share what it is
they’re picking up on. Pay attention to Empathy as an instrument.
Fine tune it by helping them know who their most important
stakeholders and customers are. Help them focus their Empathy
towards those people. Play back to them great words they’ve used to
describe emotion. Challenge them to develop an extensive vocabulary
to describe emotion and give it a project or performance boost. For
example: “In that meeting we just had, I got the sense that you
were feeling apprehensive about starting the interns on such a big
project. Can you tell me more about that and what might make it
easier for us?”

Partner by asking them what they’re sensing and allow them time to
think about it. Ask things like, “What’s your impression of..?”,
“How did that land with..?”, and “When might be a good time to…?”
Be honest with them about your own emotion and reaction. They’ll
know if you’re not being honest, and they’ll appreciate your
ability to speak their language.

If Empathy is one of your Dominant Themes, invest in it this week
through the following challenge items:
1.Develop Killer Questions: Share a coffee with someone and spend
the conversation asking great questions that help them describe
their own experience and emotion. At the end, debrief individually
by listing the best questions you asked. You know you’re asking a
great question when the other person talks more!
2.Journal your own emotions for 1 week. Give yourself quick
check-ins throughout the day and write down what you are feeling.
Try to use different words to describe your experience each
time.
3.Listen to a guided meditation (one of my favorites is called
“Just Breathe” in a specific app, but just search for one). Do this
for 5 minutes to help you release any emotion you may be holding
onto that isn’t yours.

If Empathy is not one of your Dominant Themes, invest in it this
week through the following challenge items:
1.Develop a conversation question that demonstrates you care about
others. It could be “How are you feeling?”, “What’s most important
to you today?” or “How full is your tank?” Ask yourself what works
for you that you truly care about knowing and ask it 5 times this
week.
2.Which themes help you connect with others?