Episode 009 – 10 Tips for Emotional Regulation

Summary:


In Episode 009, Joseph lists the 10 tips for emotional
regulation. Every day is filled with its stressors and we’re left
with the question—how do we respond? Do we let our emotions guide
or lead our response or do we have control over our emotions?
Emotional dysregulation—like getting upset—is a very common
occurrence for all of us. In this podcast, Joseph will give us a
more rounded view of how to perceive our emotions and the ways in
which we can better regulate them—for your benefit and for the
benefit of your relationships, too.


Time Stamped Show Notes:


00:01 – Introduction to Mind Your Mind Podcast

00:28 – Today’s topic: 10 Tips for Emotional Regulation

00:55 – There are different levels of emotional dysregulation

01:13 – “Emotions come and go, but they feel so strong”

01:23 – Emotion comes from the root “motion” which means
movement, they are there to guide us, push us, and motivate us to
action

01:48 – Be aware that emotion comes from the amygdala – the
body’s alarm system

02:30 – We can slow emotions down in order to decipher what’s
worth reacting to and what needs to be controlled better

02:50 – “Emotions are a temporary state of mind, don’t let
them permanently destroy you” – Anonymous

03:00 – 10 Ways to Keep Yourself Emotionally Regulated



o03:11 – Want to print out this list? Go toMind Your Mind


o03:34 – #1 Buy time and take a break


o04:38 – #2 Identify your needs


o05:07 – #3 Call out what’s going on


o05:35 – #4 Break it down


o06:14 – #5 Distract yourself


o06:37 – #6 Choose the higher road


o07:29 – #7 GIVE in regards to relationships—be Gentle,
Interested, Validate, be Easy


o08:13 – #8 DEAR MAN—which describes how to be objective in
difficult times—Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce &
Mindful, Associate, Negotiate (Dr. Marsha Linehan)


o09:24 – #9 Accept yourself while rising to the challenge


o09:54 – #10 Seek outside help


10:26 – The more time you have, the more you calm down

10:35 – Quarantine the issue – don’t exaggerate it

10:51 – Learn from your past mistakes and past successes

11:25 – Send your questions toMind Your Mind


11:33 – Question from Brittany in UK, “Joe, I find
myself having extreme mood swings daily and feel out of control
to manage them. Will therapy help me?”– Joseph
believes in therapy. When you’re working with a therapist, ask
them about their past experience. Identify the behaviors that
you’re doing that are getting in the way and causing the mood
swings. Discuss what’s at stake that will encourage you to make
a change.

12:41 – End of this week’s podcast!



3 Key Points:
Our emotions are a part of us and act as signals to us, but
they can, with training,be regulated and not become out of
control.You DON’T have to react in the heat of the moment and
emotion – give yourself time to process.Our past successes and
failures are our greatest teachers – if there are triggers in a
relationship that cause dysregulated emotions, STOP that behavior
and do what works.

Resources


Calming the Emotional Storm - book with solid tips and
skillshttps://www.amazon.com/Calming-Emotional-Storm-Dialectical-Behavior/dp/1608820874/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1491445932&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=calmiung+the+emotonal+storm

DBT Skills Workbook - Joseph’s favorite book on emotional
regulation.https://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy-Skills-Workbook/dp/1572245131/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1491445922&sr=8-3&keywords=dbt+skills