Summary:
In Episode 009, Joseph lists the 10 tips for emotional
regulation. Every day is filled with its stressors and we’re left
with the question—how do we respond? Do we let our emotions guide
or lead our response or do we have control over our emotions?
Emotional dysregulation—like getting upset—is a very common
occurrence for all of us. In this podcast, Joseph will give us a
more rounded view of how to perceive our emotions and the ways in
which we can better regulate them—for your benefit and for the
benefit of your relationships, too.
Time Stamped Show Notes:
00:01 – Introduction to Mind Your Mind Podcast
00:28 – Today’s topic: 10 Tips for Emotional Regulation
00:55 – There are different levels of emotional dysregulation
01:13 – “Emotions come and go, but they feel so strong”
01:23 – Emotion comes from the root “motion” which means
movement, they are there to guide us, push us, and motivate us to
action
01:48 – Be aware that emotion comes from the amygdala – the
body’s alarm system
02:30 – We can slow emotions down in order to decipher what’s
worth reacting to and what needs to be controlled better
02:50 – “Emotions are a temporary state of mind, don’t let
them permanently destroy you” – Anonymous
03:00 – 10 Ways to Keep Yourself Emotionally Regulated
o03:11 – Want to print out this list? Go toMind Your Mind
o03:34 – #1 Buy time and take a break
o04:38 – #2 Identify your needs
o05:07 – #3 Call out what’s going on
o05:35 – #4 Break it down
o06:14 – #5 Distract yourself
o06:37 – #6 Choose the higher road
o07:29 – #7 GIVE in regards to relationships—be Gentle,
Interested, Validate, be Easy
o08:13 – #8 DEAR MAN—which describes how to be objective in
difficult times—Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce &
Mindful, Associate, Negotiate (Dr. Marsha Linehan)
o09:24 – #9 Accept yourself while rising to the challenge
o09:54 – #10 Seek outside help
10:26 – The more time you have, the more you calm down
10:35 – Quarantine the issue – don’t exaggerate it
10:51 – Learn from your past mistakes and past successes
11:25 – Send your questions toMind Your Mind
11:33 – Question from Brittany in UK, “Joe, I find
myself having extreme mood swings daily and feel out of control
to manage them. Will therapy help me?”– Joseph
believes in therapy. When you’re working with a therapist, ask
them about their past experience. Identify the behaviors that
you’re doing that are getting in the way and causing the mood
swings. Discuss what’s at stake that will encourage you to make
a change.
12:41 – End of this week’s podcast!
3 Key Points:
Our emotions are a part of us and act as signals to us, but
they can, with training,be regulated and not become out of
control.You DON’T have to react in the heat of the moment and
emotion – give yourself time to process.Our past successes and
failures are our greatest teachers – if there are triggers in a
relationship that cause dysregulated emotions, STOP that behavior
and do what works.
Resources
Calming the Emotional Storm - book with solid tips and
skillshttps://www.amazon.com/Calming-Emotional-Storm-Dialectical-Behavior/dp/1608820874/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1491445932&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=calmiung+the+emotonal+storm
DBT Skills Workbook - Joseph’s favorite book on emotional
regulation.https://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy-Skills-Workbook/dp/1572245131/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1491445922&sr=8-3&keywords=dbt+skills
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