Conversation With a Psychopath About the Mind Of Rex Heuermann

In a gripping episode of the podcast "Hidden Killers," hosted by
Tony Brueski, listeners were given an intimate look into the mind
of a diagnosed psychopath. M.E. Thomas, author of Confessions of
a Sociopath: A Lifespan Hiding in Plain Sight, discussed the
complexities of living with this misunderstood personality
disorder.
 
Tony Brueski begins by referencing Rex Heuermann, who, though
unconfirmed, he speculates might be a sociopath or psychopath
based on his behaviors. The primary discussion revolves around
the art of mask-wearing, a metaphor for the sociopath's habit of
presenting different personalities to different
individuals.
 
“I'd imagine that must be exhausting, trying to compartmentalize
things that way,” Brueski remarked, probing Thomas about the
strain of living multiple realities.
 
Thomas revealed that the challenges of managing these “masks”
varied over her life. During her younger years, where life was
transient – moving from junior high to high school to college –
it was more about reinvention. The real pressure mounted when she
stepped into a stable career. One misstep, one moment of
inconsistency in these masks could lead to significant
consequences. Thomas noted, “It only became more difficult when I
became a little bit more stable… there was more of a serious
consequence, I guess, if I dropped the ball on something.”
 
 She further elaborated on the toll of juggling these
personas, saying that maintaining a career and long-term
relationships became incredibly draining. "Being around people,
talking to people was really draining," Thomas shared.
 
In a particularly candid moment, Thomas described how she
navigated relationships. She explained that when she couldn't
maintain the personality she had built with someone, she would
typically abandon the relationship. "It wasn't a reflection on
them really," she clarified, highlighting that the burden of
living up to another's expectations while adapting to new
situations was just too much.
 
Brueski then pivoted the conversation back to Rex Heuermann,
asking Thomas to speculate on his mental state now that he's
potentially been caught for crimes. Thomas, emphasizing that it's
purely speculative, said that Heuermann might feel relief
initially. He would be free from the taxing burden of pretending.
Yet, as time moves on, she theorizes that he might begin to miss
the intimacy and connection from his past life, saying, "Even
people with personality disorders want an intimate connection
with people."
 
When asked about regret, Thomas dissected the difference between
regretting the crimes versus regretting getting caught. She
opined that for someone like Heuermann, it might not be about
sloppiness. "I don't think he would see it necessarily as
sloppiness. He'd just be like that was just me taking more risks,
but also getting more reward," she speculated.
 
The enlightening conversation on "Hidden Killers" provides a
unique perspective into the minds of individuals who, by their
very nature, live in the shadows of society. Through M.E.
Thomas’s candid sharing, listeners gain a deeper understanding of
sociopathy's intricacies and the continuous dance between
revealing and concealing one’s true self.
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