The Leader’s Role in a Ward Member’s Divorce | An Interview with Noelle McBride

Noelle McBride is a professional motivational speaker and teacher
with over 20 years of experience counseling and teaching women in
groups and individually. She currently leads women in gospel-based
workshops that are focused on overcoming the trials and hardships
of divorce. She also serves as an ordinance worker in the Seattle
Temple and in her stake Relief Society presidency. After having
been blessed with three children during a 17-year marriage, Noelle
went through a difficult and heartbreaking divorce. Notwithstanding
this hardship, she experienced much healing and hope in her
personal life, through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Desiring
to help other women navigate the same trial, Noelle shares the
promises and peace of the gospel in her first published book,
Beauty for Ashes: Divorce and the Latter-day Saint Woman.
Highlights 03:15 Noelle explains why she wrote her book and what
led her to write it 04:30 Noelle shares her story of marriage,
divorce, being single, and getting remarried 06:40 What was the
breaking point in the marriage? 08:00 How do you know you're
healed? What does that feel like? 10:30 Divorce is like the death
of a marriage. There is a grieving process to go through. 11:15
When you marry someone your hearts are knitted together. Divorce
rips them apart. True healing of your heart only comes through
Jesus Christ not outside sources. 12:25 Noelle served a mission of
sorts after her divorce. When she wasn’t with her children she
would go out with the sister missionaries. She followed a routine
similar to the missionaries to aid her in her healing. 16:00
Sometimes when we are hurting and grieving we seek for outside
sources instead of going to Christ 19:30 Concepts and questions
that leaders can ask to help someone going through a divorce 21:30
Noelle shares things that leaders did in her ward that helped her
get through her divorce 24:00 The power of being present and just
sitting with someone 26:30 As leaders we need to keep members'
names safe. Allow people to share the details of their situation
that they want to share. 28:45 Noelle shares the dynamics of
staying in the same ward as her ex husband and how she navigated
it. She always had someone to sit with. 33:10 What a leader should
do when a man or woman comes in and says they are getting divorced.
Leaders need to respect personal revelation and allow them to have
space and silence to receive revelation. 40:20 Kurt shares his
experience as a bishop working with divorcees. Bishops should
encourage people to get legal counsel and therapy. 44:20 The
doctrine of forgiveness when it comes to divorce 50:00 Noelle
shares her experience with therapy and the help she received from
her bishop 57:20 Use single brothers and sisters in service 1:03:00
How can leaders utilize Noelle’s book? 1:06:45 Noelle shares how
her divorce brought her closer to the Savior Links Beauty for
Ashes: Divorce and the Latter-day Saint Woman Read the TRANSCRIPT
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