68: Unchained and unbothered with Keturah Kendrick

Welcome to today's episode of Unclassified Woman. Today I'm
speaking to Shanghai based Keturah Kendrick, who shares her
perspective on being childfree by choice.


Whose voice do you listen to most? When it comes to marriage and
having children, it seems that everyone has an opinion regarding
how YOU should live your life. Today’s show is all about
listening to YOUR voice and making the choices that make YOU
happy.


Keturah Kendrick is an American writer, blogger and podcaster who
has lived on three different continents and travelled to more
than a dozen countries.


For years she has written about her life as a single woman who
sees being unmarried as a lifestyle choice like any other, as
opposed to an “illness from which I must be cured.” She also
writes about her lifelong disinterest in motherhood, critiquing
the cultural expectation that black women, in particular, are
destined to birth and raise children.


An English teacher by trade, she has discussed her favourite
books with her students in New York, Rwanda, and Shanghai. Her
debut collection of essays, No Thanks: Black, Female, and Living
in the Martyr-Free Zone, will be published in June 2019. Keturah
enjoys food and travel, specifically, eating her way through her
favourite countries---and who can blame her?


What you’ll hear in this episode:


Keturah calls New York and New Orleans home. She needed a
break and wanted to travel, so spent 2 years in Rwanda teaching
English and then found a position in Shanghai.

Her not having a child is “absolutely by personal
choice”---she always knew that motherhood would never be “her
thing”.

How she has felt the pressure just beneath the surface and
has been told she is being silly, selfish, and must be a broken
woman to not want children

The mockery she felt when she voiced her desire to never have
kids.

How she was raised that the only thing that validated a
woman's life was to be someone’s wife and mother.

The subtle influences that she was “being unfair to her
phantom husband” by not wanting children.

Where is the logic in anyone trying to convince another
person to have a baby?

Why Keturah has become more vocal in her writing and her
podcast.

Why parenting should be a lifestyle choice that some people
make and shouldn’t be tied to your gender.

Many women around the world don’t have a choice and don’t
have access to contraception.

Why there should be tolerance for everyone’s right to
individual choice about their roles.

How Keturah uses her creative energy in her blog, writing,
and being with other people.

How she’s always been true to herself about what she
wanted--”When I look back, I see that everyone was wrong but me.”

The ways we encourage and blatantly tell young women that
every other voice but their own is important.

Why Keturah is glad she trusted in her own instincts and
didn’t let anyone convince her to go against what she knew was
right for her.

How Keturah approached the topic of children with a longtime
partner, who believed he may want children.

The conditioning by society to fit the dominant narrative and
how this plays out in relationships.

Keturah’s advice: “Ignore everybody’s voice but your own,
including your mother and your man. I want absolute joy and
fulfilment for everyone. If motherhood is that for you, then do
it, but if not, then listen to your voice until you make a
decision.”

Parting words from Keturah: Don’t get off the fence if you
are undecided! Don’t be afraid to tell people to mind their own
business! Listen to no one’s voice but your own!



Find out more about Keturah and her work at


www.keturahkendrick.com


Find her on Twitter: @HappySingleGal


Find Keturah’s blog: www.yetanothersinglegal.com


Find Keturah’s podcast: www.unchainedandunbothered.com 


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I would love to hear what you found most helpful about
this interview. Thank you.