Episode 49 - La La Land

Damien Chazelle's 2016 musical "La La Land” follows an age-old
tradition of blatantly making movies for the sole purpose of
licking Hollywood's balls in order to win Oscars. It’s right on
par with other transparently pandering piles of garbage like
2014’s “Birdman,” 2012’s “Argo” and 2011’s “The Artist.” The only
way these filmmakers could have tried harder to win would have
been to go door-to-door and give head to each and every member of
the Academy. Only they and their therapists will ever know the
truth.


Emma Stone plays Mia, an aspiring actress who is supposed to be
incredibly good at what she does because she’s able to summon
tears while holding a cell phone, but people just don’t see her
alleged brilliance. Then, she meets a man who inspires her to
write a one-woman show, which leads her to the stardom she always
wanted, but their relationship ends because she has to go to
Paris for a couple months.


Ryan Gosling plays Sebastian, an overly-nostalgic, jazz-obsessed
lunatic with a stool fetish. When he’s not breaking out into song
or tap dancing, he has to play humiliating gigs in order to
support himself. After he finally lands a gig that both allows
him to play with talented musicians and save money for his goal
of one day opening his own jazz club, his girlfriend Mia
immediately turns on him for being a sellout, and they break up.


Yes, this movie won six Oscars (well, seven, for a few
minutes). 


Join us as we discuss what Jonathan Lipnicki would sound like if
he were a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, how a movie theater usher
was blinded by a Hot Tamale during a candy fight, and some better
lyrics to the loathsome songs on this soundtrack.


Tell us what you think by chatting with us (@filmsnuff)
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shooting us an email over at mailbag@filmsnuff.com.


This episode is sponsored by RelationshipRenaissance.


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