What is a Lifegiver?

You would think that this would be easy for me as I have been
using the term "lifegiver" for years to describe the kind of
person I want to become. Yet when it came time to work on this
episode, not only did I have a loss for words- I also went
through a challenging week that completely changed my
perspective. The military has a way of taking everything you put
nicely in an organized box in your mind and then dumping it out
and walking on it. Or maybe that's just me... I have a feeling
you have been there, too. I admit that I am not especially strong
at adapting to change quickly which you can imagine makes being a
military wife tough. Yet, in that moment, I thought about all of
you. I was reminded of how much grit it takes to be a military
spouse, regardless of branch or circumstance. Some days are easy,
others can feel excruciating- yet we find a way to push through
and find a silver-lining. In this episode, I describe what a
Lifegiver is and the three things that I have found in common
with every Lifegiver I have ever met. If we want to make a
difference in our home and in the world, these are three things
we MUST do. I hope it challenges and encourages you to work
towards your purpose and potential. She must know her current
passion and calling. What is it you love to do? What fires you up
and makes you angry with the world? A Lifegiver must define or
begin to define what she is currently passionate about and then
be working towards her future purpose. What can you do right now
to keep growing despite where the military sends you or whether
it takes your spouse away? Creativity is crucial, knowing your
purpose will help provide the hope as your place, the people, and
seasons change. Secret: Our calling is rarely tied to things like
your business, your crafts, or your ideas. The most fulfilling
calling will always involve people who need the lifegiving hope
our wisdom carries. Here is a short talk from Brene Brown on
understanding the power of empathy. A Lifegiver must be able to
protect her calling. Protection involves both offense and
defense. You must first be able to know how to take care of
yourself. Each of you likely know what state you are in and what
you are “needing to do” or being asked to do to take care of
yourself- so do something today that moves you in that direction-
at least one thing. But a Lifegiver must also work in Defense.
Once you know your calling, it is much easier to say no to the
energy wasters be it tasks or people that suck the life out of
you. Knowing your calling gives you the words you need to say no
to other things. My challenge to you is to make a mission
statement if you haven’t already. A Lifegiver must give her
marriage and family her first fruits. As much as I hate hearing
the phrase often used by the military to “put your household in
order”, there is much truth in that no person can be mission
ready if those she is responsible for are neglected, in conflict,
or in trouble. The place where you have the most impact and
influence is at home. Think of it this way. What you may have to
offer someone else, multiplies when you invest in it at home.
What someone else might walk away saying, “Gee that was nice of
her” gets a “That was exactly what I needed in my life today”
from our husband or children. Our calling is something that is a
life journey, we will often need to take sabbaticals to give our
first fruits to those that mean the most to us. This does not
mean you lose your calling, but if you don’t take care of your
first responsibility, you CAN lose your family. Bring life to the
garden in your own backyard before starting a greenhouse
business. Here is a great TedTalk by Benjamin Zander on how to
define whether you know you are making a difference. He is a
Classical Musician and uses music to make an incredible point.