Military Spouse Journey Day 1

Hello Air Force! My first day started off with the bright lights
of day when it should have been 2am. I got about 4 hours of sleep
thanks to the “sleepy pills” the on-plane physician handed out. I
am your normal everyday military spouse who happens to be a
clinician, but I am going to do my best to share with you what I
experienced today. My hope is that I can take this experience and
translate it in a way that coffee will encourage you to invest in
your marriage. We landed at INCIRLIK Air Base in Turkey which
conducts many of the airstrike missions in Syria. US Families
(mostly Air Force) are stationed here much like any other OCONUS
assignment but because of the rising tensions in and around
Turkey and its border with Syria, families have been placed on
lockdown and cannot leave base. Many of the families that were
here before the lockdown remember what it is like to travel into
the city, which makes it even harder. I imagined that many of
them feel isolated and trapped. Can you imagine some of the new
spouses getting an assignment to Turkey and then finding out they
can’t leave the base once here? While here, there was a town hall
for military families where they could ask Secretary Carter
questions. Most of the questions were on the lockdown, how long
it would continue, and would there be an upcoming forced
evacuation. Secretary Carter was very encouraging that he did not
foresee a forced evacuation and hoped that things would improve.
My mission here is to understand what it is like for our service
members. Seeing our Air Force in full force was intimidating, in
a good way. They are putting in long hours both on the ground and
in the air. Many of the spouses here described how much better
they understand deployments now that they are watching “at home
deployments” play out in front of them. Their service member is
tired but determined to complete the incredible mission given
them. The threat of ISIS is very real. It already feels real to
us there in America, but here our military families can’t even
leave base to go into town. The importance of building allies and
coalition partners is necessary and our leaders are working hard
to do it. It was incredible to see Airmen from Germany, Spain,
and Turkey all joining our personnel for the same cause. Some of
the coalition airmen stood up to thank our US airmen for their
hospitality and how proud they were to be fighting ISIS with us.
Turkey was warm for December. Not as hot as it would be in the
summer, but the families there are enjoying 70 degree weather.
Seeing the city in the distance made me wonder how safe some of
the families are out there. One spouse here is Turkish and cannot
get off base to see her mother. I can’t imagine who scary that
is! Since I am an Army spouse, I have to give a shout out to the
incredible power we have in our aircraft. I saw every plane you
can imagine lined up, many of them loaded with the bombs that are
ready for the next mission. As my heart rumbled in my chest as
the fighter jets took off, I couldn’t help but be thankful for
what they do and the amount of skill and precision they develop
to do it. I totally get it Air Force Spouses- it is pretty
incredible to witness. From the moment I stepped on this historic
plane, refueling in air, and then visiting Incirlik, I am so
proud of our Air Force. My father was a pilot in the Air Force
and I feel like I am seeing him in his jumpsuit around every
corner. Today’s #PowerofMarriage message is this: 1. The mission
our service members are called to do is not only real, but more
important than ever. It is a noble cause whether it is to protect
our lives or someone else’s. Keeping their mind on the mission is
paramount to success in that moment. As hard as it is to let them
go and not heap unnecessary stress on them- it is the right thing
to do. This doesn’t mean that we don’t communicate. On the
contrary, it means that we learn to communicate better, quicker,
identifying the root issue so that it can be resolved or
processed. Striving not for perfection, but for peace, is not
only good for us, but beneficial for them. 2. Our military tempo
is very different than it used to be. Deployments aren’t going
away, if anything we are adding a new component that keep hearing
about from spouses. It is the deployment from home- the long work
hours that feel like a deployment. I’m not sure, perhaps some of
you would say one is easier than the other. Both are stressful on
the relationship. Be intentional with your time together. Decide
together how and when you will decompress by setting a specific
time and time limit.