Bullying with Dr. Bina Patel

Bullying is a worldwide epidemic that impacts both children and
adults. In today’s culture, we see cyber-bullying impacting
adults like never before. Divisive conversations over social
media, trolling, and mean-ness is causing people to think twice
about staying connected online. During this episode in the
parenting series, I sit down with Dr. Bina Patel an expert in
workplace dynamics, conflict mediation with women, and conflict
mediation between culture/religious groups. Dr. Patel offers
strategies you can use in your workplace, volunteer circles and
with your kids on how to confront bullies and build confidence.
In today’s culture, 30% of teens in the US have experienced
bullying School bullying: 1 in 4 kids at school have been
bullied; 160K kids in the US miss school due to bullying Gay
bullying: 2 to 3times more likely to commit suicide and 30% of
all completed suicides have been related to sexual identity
crisis in the US. 9 out of 10 LGBT students have reported being
bullied at school within the past year. It’s not just for kids,
though. Bullying between adults can make the workplace difficult
to walk into each day. While many of us grew up being told to
ignore a bully, Dr. Patel offers some ways to confront the bully
immediately. Dr. Patel offers us an inspiring way to help our
children build their self-esteem, find their words, get to the
root of their feelings, and become assertive. Of course we all
need a little bit of this too! Here are a few tips and resources
that Dr. Patel offered: Confront the bully: don’t ignore it. Turn
the negative into a compliment Love and respect: be confident and
love yourself. If you respect yourself, the negativity and harsh
words of the bullying will bounce off of you. – you control your
own emotions, if you believe that you do, others will not be able
to hurt you. Tell them to stop: point out they’re hurting you
(assertive communication) – use the “put yourself in my shoes”
technique. Silence: specific to online bullying- confront them
through assertive communication, but do not continue the dialog.
This is more harmful to the victim as others are reading it and
it is set in writing. Note: if nothing else works, the silent
treatment is the best treatment. As the victim, walk away from
the bullying. Online bullying: block posts, delete the posts,
report them to Facebook; reach out to the victim either via
separate/private message, or stand up for the victim by
responding to a bully’s post (assertive communication). Note to
Parents: Know your child – know their behaviors, moods, and what
makes them tick/happy. If you are cognizant of their behaviors on
a normal basis, you will know that something is wrong if your
child does not eat, becomes withdrawn, looks sad, etc. Monitor
the social media outlets that your child may be using. It is wise
to create an account to monitor them, more so that you are aware
if someone is bullying them. Be a friend! When your child is
depressed, sad, withdrawn, etc, talk them as though you are
friends. It is important so that the child feels comfortable they
can tell you what is on their mind. One of the books recommended:
Confessions of a Former Bully