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Jesus said to his apostles: “Whoever loves father or mother more
than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more
than me is not worthy of me; and whoever does not take up his cross
and follow after me is not worthy of me.” Matthew 10:37–38
When a scribe approached Jesus and asked Him which of the
commandments was the greatest, He replied: “‘You shall love the
Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all
your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘You
shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other
commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:30–31).
Today’s Gospel offers a similar teaching: We must love God above
all else—even more than father, mother, son, or daughter. By
contrasting love for God with love for family, Jesus is not
diminishing familial affection; rather, He is revealing that the
only way to truly love others is by loving God first.
Saint Thomas Aquinas teaches: “God must be loved above all things
and before all others out of charity, for He is loved as the source
of happiness, whereas our neighbor is loved as one who shares in
that happiness along with us” (Summa Theologiae II-II, Q.26,
A.2). In other words, God must be loved first because He is the
ultimate cause and source of beatitude—the only true happiness.
Though we are called to love our families and our neighbors,
Christian charity dictates that we love them in relation to God—as
fellow recipients of divine happiness.
One reason this Gospel is challenging is that our natural
affections, though good, must be transformed by divine charity. It
is natural to love our parents and children—God designed us with
these affections. Even animals instinctively care for their
offspring. But Jesus calls us to something higher: a love that is
perfected by divine charity, transcending mere emotional attachment
or duty. His teaching does not negate natural love; rather, it
purifies, elevates, and directs it toward the highest good—God
Himself.
When Jesus speaks of loving “father or mother” or “son or daughter”
more than Him, He is addressing the inner conflict we sometimes
experience in our emotions. When natural affection is not
transformed by spiritual charity, the love we offer another can do
more harm than good. Disordered affection replaces the ultimate
good—God—with the lesser good of emotional attachment and human
consolation. The real danger arises when our loved ones stray from
God’s will, and we, out of misguided affection, affirm them in
their error, thereby confirming them in a state lacking true
beatitude.
The foundation of true love is this: God alone is the source of
perfect happiness, for us and for our loved ones. Our belief in God
transforms the way we love others. No longer do we merely seek
their earthly comfort or emotional well-being; rather, we direct
them to the eternal Good—God Himself—who alone fulfills every
longing.
When we love God first, all our relationships are purified. Instead
of loving others with human affection alone, we love them with the
very love of God, seeking their ultimate good: eternal life in Him.
This purified love does not exclude human affection; rather, it
elevates and directs it, ensuring that our love is not merely
sentimental but truly transformative through divine charity.
Reflect today on those closest to you—those whom God calls you to
love with the highest form of love. Are your affections rightly
ordered, or do they sometimes compete with the charity God desires
to instill in you? If so, turn your heart to God. Seek to love Him
above all else. Let Him become the object of your deepest love and
desire. When God is first, His love will transform you from within,
enabling you to love others not just with natural affection, but
with the very love of Christ, leading them to the eternal joy of
union with Him.
Lord of perfect charity, Your love is pure, holy, and beyond all
understanding—so vast, so encompassing, that I will never fathom
its depths. Draw me into this love, O Lord, that I may love You
above all things. From that love, let the charity of Your Sacred
Heart flow through me to others, so that in loving them, I love
You. Jesus, I trust in You.
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