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Fraternal Charity
Jesus said to his disciples: “If your brother sins against you, go
and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to
you, you have won over your brother. If he does not listen, take
one or two others along with you, so that every fact may be
established on the testimony of two or three witnesses.” Matthew
18:15–16
Fraternal charity is an absolute necessity. We are called to love
everyone unconditionally, even those who have sinned against us.
Moreover, our charity must go beyond an interior disposition; it
must be expressed in action. At times, such love is easy—like the
natural affection parents feel toward a child entrusted to them by
God. But when a family member, friend, or stranger sins against us,
offering unconditional love becomes far more difficult.
In today’s Gospel, Jesus addresses this difficult form of love: “If
your brother sins against you…” Here, “brother” refers to every
person. In Christ, we are all brothers and sisters, children of our
Heavenly Father—even those who have strayed. When someone sins
against us, the natural result is a wound. If charity is absent
from our response, that wound can fester, giving way to bitterness,
resentment, and even a desire for revenge.
The love to which Jesus calls us is one that allows grace to
quickly heal the wounds inflicted by sin. Yes, the pain is
real—there is always a wound—but that wound does not have to infect
the soul. Instead, God’s grace can transform our pain into a source
of healing, even for the one who has harmed us. In fact, when
someone sins against us, we may become instruments of God’s mercy
in a unique and powerful way, drawing the sinner back to God.
To facilitate this, Jesus lays out four progressive expressions of
mercy that His disciples—and we—are to follow when someone sins
against us. The first is to approach the offender privately: “Go
and tell him his fault between you and him alone.” This is an act
of mercy. Our first instinct may be to speak about the offense with
others—to gossip or vent in anger. Yet even when the wrongdoing is
real, we must guard against the sin of detraction, the unjust or
unnecessary revelation of another’s faults. The Lord’s method
preserves the person’s dignity and seeks the offender’s repentance,
not shame.
Second, if a private conversation proves ineffective, we are to
return with one or two others. In Jewish law, a matter was legally
confirmed by the testimony of two or three witnesses. Jesus draws
on this tradition, not to humiliate, but to validate the concern
and strengthen the call to conversion, extending mercy more
firmly.
Third, if the person still refuses to repent, Jesus says: “Tell the
Church.” The Church, as the sacrament of salvation, is the final
guardian of both truth and mercy. Through her pastoral authority,
she may exercise spiritual discipline—not to condemn, but to awaken
the sinner to the seriousness of his actions and call him to
repentance. In appropriate circumstances, members of the Church,
such as parents or grandparents, may also fulfill this role within
their proper sphere of influence.
Finally, “If he refuses to listen even to the Church, then treat
him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector.” This is not a call
to hatred or rejection, but a recognition that the person has
placed himself outside the communion of grace. Even at this stage,
charity remains: We pray, love, and await the moment when God’s
grace might heal. Treating someone this way is not to condemn, but
to call that person back through God’s mercy and justice.
Reflect today on the mercy to which you are called when others sin
against you. Consider the wounds you carry and whether they have
become occasions of grace or sources of resentment. Pray for the
strength to follow our Lord’s clear path of fraternal
correction—not with harshness or judgment, but with the gentle
firmness of love. Let your wounds become channels of healing, and
allow Christ’s mercy to flow through you so that others may be
drawn back to God. In this way, you will not only win your brother
or sister back but also grow in holiness yourself.
Most merciful Jesus, You desire that every sinner turn back to
You and be restored to Your grace. When someone sins against me,
please place the desire of Your Heart in mine, so that I never seek
retribution but love. May I become a powerful instrument of Your
mercy for others, especially those who have sinned against me most
deeply. Jesus, I trust in You.
Image: Sermon on the Mount Stained Glass, by Jean-Baptiste
Capronnier
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