#755: Hugh Jackman and Esther Perel

This episode is a two-for-one, and that’s because the podcast
recently hit its 10-year anniversary and passed one billion
downloads. To celebrate, I’ve curated some of the best of the
best—some of my favorites—from more than 700 episodes over the
last decade. I could not be more excited. The episode features
segments from episode #444 "Hugh Jackman on Best
Decisions, Daily Routines, The 85% Rule, Favorite Exercises, Mind
Training, and Much More" and #241
"The Relationship Episode: Sex, Love,
Polyamory, Marriage, and More (with Esther
Perel)."


Please enjoy!


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Timestamps:


[00:00] Start


[05:46] Notes about this supercombo format.


[06:49] Enter Hugh Jackman.


[07:22] What books has Hugh gifted most?


[10:35] Hugh's meditation practices.


[14:07] Summoning and maintaining the emotional and physical
energy necessary for performing.


[19:59] What lessons did Hugh's father teach him about being an
example to others?


[25:32] The contract Hugh made with himself at the end of drama
school.


[29:13] Best decisions Hugh made in the first years of being an
aspiring/working actor.


[34:23] How has Hugh learned to trust his intuition?


[37:07] The design of the day and the efficacy of manifestation.


[39:38] The most efficient exercises Hugh knows.


[40:53] The importance of incorporating relaxation into physical
activity (the 85% rule).


[44:17] Enter Esther Perel.


[44:41] Esther's background.


[46:11] Growing up among Holocaust survivors in Antwerp.


[53:45] Her parents' survival: chance vs. choice.


[1:02:27] Trust or vulnerability: which comes first?


[1:04:24] Impermanence as motivation for living fully.


[1:06:24] Esther on being counterphobic.


[1:09:35] Studying in Jerusalem.


[1:14:02] Seeking and approaching mentors.


[1:22:39] Eroticism as an antidote to death.


[1:26:04] Options for couples with sexual listlessness.


[1:33:04] Too much honesty in relationships? American vs.
European views.


[1:39:07] Complete sharing vs. caring in relationships.


[1:40:16] Guiding patients through infidelity disclosure.


[1:45:29] Overcoming fear of abandonment in non-exclusive
relationships.


[1:52:23] Quarterly relationship report cards.


[1:53:54] "Don't ask, don't tell" in polyamorous relationships.


[1:55:46] Innovation and flexibility over rigid ideology in
relationships.


[1:58:43] Relationships as power dynamics.


[2:02:20] The research process for Esther's book on adultery.


[2:08:36] Arguments for marriage today.


[2:13:47] Divorce rates in second marriages.


[2:15:13] Marriage's effect on relationship behavior.


[2:17:54] Human questions explored through infidelity in Esther's
book.


[2:21:48] Books Esther frequently gifts and rereads.


[2:22:42] Esther's billboard.


[2:23:15] Parting thoughts.


*


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Past guests on The Tim Ferriss
Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh
Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin
Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew
McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth
Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah
Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine
Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary
Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael
Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold
Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria
Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de
Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly
Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard
Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael
Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan
Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit
Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim
Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval
Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth
Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard
Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid
Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick
Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren
Aronofsky, Margaret Atwood, Mark Zuckerberg, Peter
Thiel, Dr. Gabor Maté, Anne Lamott, Sarah
Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, and many more.


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